by Aarron Pina | Mar 11, 2013 | Christ, discipleship, Monday Morning Momentum
Do you know someone who’s always hopeless or pessimistic? They’ve tried and failed. They tried again with a better plan or better people and the people, the plan, or both fell through. “Maybe, it’s just me.” they think. They look at the sky and see a half a cloud, so it must be about to pour, right? You plead with them – “It’s (insert your city or town). If you don’t like the weather, just wait a few minutes and it’ll change.”
“Wrong.” they say, listing all of the valid exceptions: “Lima, Peru – it never rains; Seattle, WA – always raining; and San Diego – always sunny and 72.”
You beg and reason with them until you’re blue in the face. You may even begin to question yourself in light of all the evidence they present. Maybe, you’ve even walked away from them for a season.
“You have a negative view of the past, of the present, and of the future. You feel that nothing is going to get better—that it’s terrible now and it’s going to stay this way the rest of your life,” says Dr. Archibald Hart.
“My life has always been rainy… There’s no hope. I’m a Seattle and all of my friends are San Diegos.” Hoplessness, shame, and pessimism are lies that affirm this: “the past = the future”. If that were true, why bother? But, we can bother. We are called to bother. Jesus died to dump hopelessness, shame, and pessimism in the lake of fire.
David asks God the tough questions throughout the Psalms about why the wicked prosper and prods at God “how long will you let… [this injustice continue]” Jeremiah models it, too, in 20.18:
“Why did I ever come out of the womb to see trouble and sorrow and to end my days in shame?”
The great news for your friend who is hopeless, burdened by shame, and weighed down by pessimism: Elijah, Moses, Job, Jonah, Jeremiah – great men of God all despaired for their lives. Yet, all saw miracles of God before their own eyes (or once they were out of the belly of the fish and could see something… Ah, you get the point.)
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Silence is Golden: So, how do you handle your “mostly cloudy” friends?Know when words just won’t do. When Job lost everything… and then lost it all again… and again… His three friends started out on the right foot:
“Then they sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was. 2.13″
Sometimes, words are necessary. Other times, words are the worst thing to bring to the table. This is more art than science – advice from the Holy Spirit is more often than not the only true barometer.
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Let Them Grieve without Giving Your Advice – when dealing with someone who’s stuck in the past, or even a present crisis, leaving your Home Depot/DIY apron in the truck is the rule of the day. As I grow wiser, I’m learning when my bride is hurting or just plain worn down by life that one of the most valuable questions I can ask is this:
“Are you telling me this because you’re seeking a solution or because you just need to vent?”
Men, this has kept my marriage on the rails more often than not – but it is wisdom for all kinds of relationships. Don’t let your talent at fixing things derail your ability to pastor a friend or confidant.
- Encourage Sincerely – When you’ve received permission to offer your opinion or advice, pray that God gives you the words to say and that you stay away from the Hallmark aisle of your brain. Nobody – I mean nobody – likes canned speeches and trite verses.
- Don’t Minimize the Past – “It’s really not that big a deal.” is incredibly an minimizing and impersonal way of saying “Your suffering is nothing.” Yes, we all need to weight our present suffering against the suffering of Christ on our behalf, but God is a personal God, not a God of facts. Take into account that everyone’s personal struggles are just that: personal. Minimizing their personal affects feels like you’re minimizing them.
- Point to Jesus – The most important bridge to build is from past or present pain to future hopes and dreams and only the death, resurrection and ransom of Christ offers us proof and assurance that the past does not equal the future. Fluffy, flowery Jesus talk doesn’t really help – see #3 – but, a real expression that we’re all stuck for now in this broken world, redeemed, and soon to be delivered is the only truth that can build that bridge.
You’re not their Messiah – a lot of times, we get hung up trying to solve their problem, rather than carrying the burden for a time. Keeping this in perspective is a crucial guardrail in staying out of the muck while pulling them out. Great lifeguards know you can’t save everyone, merely offer a steady hand to those who will accept it.
In a Genesis 3 world, we will all have trouble. But, Christ assures us in light of this He has overcome the world and will deliver us from our light and momentary troubles. Ultimately, we will one day meet Him at the Bema seat (2 Cor. 5.10) and be rewarded for the things we did in His power and crowns for the pains we suffered in the meantime.
Great rewards await… all who overcome.
in Christ,
AP
by Aarron Pina | Feb 19, 2013 | Christ, clutter, Monday Morning Momentum, ONE TH1NG, truth
Inbox on Fire?
Ever feel like a blind fireman on a high speed treadmill, putting out flames because they were “there” but working with no strategy or forethought? Ever think “If I ever do put out this fire, there’ll only be two more to take its place!”
Career path…
Promotion…
Growing responsibility…
Non-stop emails…
Honey-do list…
Four months into a nice promotion I had a tangled ball of loose ends in a sky-high inbox and onscreen, over 1,100 unread emails!
That’s when I came across David Allen’s book “Getting Things Done.” I read it until 2AM and immediately implemented everything I could. 1,100 emails went to 0 in 72 hours and I was committed to stay on top of the pile. I now had power and perspective. It lasted… or so I thought.
Smelling the Same, Old Smolder?
Shortly after our marriage, Cristine made it really clear that I’d brought too much stuff into our small apartment when we merged lives. Inbox was on fire again. Silly me thought she was just referring to stuff that could be seen. There was plenty of that, but I also had too many commitments and unfinished business on my calendar and in my head. There was smoke on the brain and it was making life stink.
Our young family was gasping for air and the mirror clearly pointed to one of the prime sources of suffocation. While I had learned some great practices and helpful principles, but applications were limited to a few compartments of my life. The cause of the fire couldn’t have been my desk… but with so much smoke, how could we track down the source? We needed clarity.
David Allen says this:
“Most peoples’ to-do lists are just incomplete collections of unclear things. Most peoples’ organization is just rearranging piles of still unclear stuff.”
So what can be done to bring clarity and abolish clutter?
Let’s flip the pages of an even better book and see what God has to say. You see, clutter isn’t just about things… it usually starts with our thoughts. As I read the word, God showed me my thinking had been very, very sloppy and sloppy thoughts come from a sloppy heart. Taming the clutter meant subduing the disobedient parts of my heart… a heart divided against the Lord.
Ultimate Fire Emergency Plan:
God provides clarity like this: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your mind and with all your strength. Deuteronomy 6:5 He also teaches us that serving rival gods leads us to a place of confusion, contamination… clutter. “No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.” Sounds like conflict, right? But, a heart divided between building two kingdoms is the primary fuel for the fire. And, a mind “controlled by the Spirit [which brings] life and peace (Rom. 8:6)” is the elite fire team designed to tame the rebellious heart’s spreading flames.
Conflict and clutter can show up in a lot of different places… our schedule, our priorities, our check book, junk drawer, our trunks, our closet, our plans, our hearts, our minds.
Clutter isn’t just a fire starter, though -it’s also a mirror. It provides clues and important evidence. The challenge for us who seek to follow Christ is in accepting that the mirror is accurate without downplaying our idolatry and service to the rival god of “[our] stuff”. Walking away from that mirror without forgetting what you’ve seen will require a plan, an act of God, and a band of brothers to watch your back.
If you ever feel like you are working harder yet falling farther behind; if your email inbox is over 100; if you feel like you own some nice stuff, but your stuff also owns you; if you smell the fresh air of freedom, but the smoke is still in your lungs; then join us at a table this Friday morning at ONE TH1NG (The Cabernet Steakhouse, Windward Pkwy & 400 from 7AM to 7:55AM) where we’ll look into the only Word that brings eternal life and can set us free from sloppy thinking, a divided heart and the luring lie of multi-tasking.
Come hungry for the truth and fasten your seat belt.
AP
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by Aarron Pina | Feb 14, 2013 | Christ, Holy Spirit, love
It’s Not What You Think… Or, Is It?
Is God “seeker friendly”? Depends on what the seeker seeks, right? “You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all of your heart. (Jer. 29:13)” In that case, sure. Those who seek Him will clearly find Him. Rock on. Seeker friendly God.
That in mind, one of the hardest things to see in the mirror is the face of the false seeker – that is, self seeking behavior. The hardest to be honest with ourselves about is that which we think we’ve done selfishly but have really done out of service to self.
For example – I try to be a thoughtful gift giver. I like to give people things that are useful and that they want. Maybe you can relate? Who wants to give someone a shirt that’s two sizes too big, not the receiver’s favorite color, and give it two days late? No, most of us want to be thoughtful givers, too. Nobody wants to be “that guy“. We want to do something for someone, but we really have our own gain on the same dashboard!
Isn’t that the sneakiest bait-and-switch?! Isn’t self deception the most annoying form of deception?! “What a wretch am I?!”
Scam Alert:
Somewhere in the well of motivations from which impulses take root and grow into actions is a pure desire. But, the bait and switch happens when the pure desire is contaminated by the selfish desire, e.g., the desire to be perceived as thoughtful, to avoid being perceived as unthoughtful, or both. Being alert to the scam is crucial in escaping its sticky reach.
Try this: next holiday or birthday, measure your internal response when the receiver reacts to the revealed gift. How do you feel when they’re not 100% overjoyed at what you’ve given them? How do you feel when they’re utterly thrilled, surprised, and compliment your choice and timing? God will make you keenly aware of what bait and switch has gone on in your heart. So, what do you do with that? Who can cure the heart, which is wicked and beyond cure?! Glad you asked.
We live in a world that is broken and refuses to be healed, in imperfect, flawed bodies, with new hearts that know our old, familiar behaviors, yet are being renewed constantly against eternal opposition from an enemy who hates us and our Creator. That same creator will judge and reward everything we do that was done with a God seeking motive. But, then, have we simply traded one selfish motive for another? Am I giving to someone because I want something from God rather than from them? Only by the Spirit can our true motivation be revealed freeing us to give out of worship to God rather than out of selfish motive.
Twenty Seconds of Pain and Stretching
So, today, and everyday moving forward, will you join me in a potentially painful exercise of faith? Will you sit face to face with the mirror – God’s word – and stare into it around 1 Cor. 13.4-8? Will you read each line and pause in silence for 15 seconds after asking the Lord – “where am I falling short in this verse?” – especially at v. 5: “self-seeking”? I can promise you, if you have never heard from the Lord, this is a place where God (who is already omnipresent) “shows up”. The first time you do it, you will hear truth that is potentially painful to hear. You will be stretched in your faith and trust. But, the payoff of the exercise is somewhat self-serving: you will be grown in the area of dependence on the Lord for His motive. This is God seeking behavior. Pray that it springs out of a God seeking heart.
Picture This: We, He, and Thee
If you are a “we” who has placed your full faith solely in the atoning sacrifice of Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, then “we” serve a God who has a will for us. Obedience to and abiding dependence on Him. We believe He communicates His will through His word and His indwelling Spirit, given to us when we place our faith in Christ. We also believe we are both simultaneously free from condemnation by Him and subject to conviction of our wrongdoing so that we may repent and be transformed by the renewing of our minds and to be conformed to His Son’s servant-like image. Can you imagine what it would be like if we were in unity of that spirit?
Will you join us? Be a we, serving He instead of “thee”.
in Christ,
AP
